Month Four

Dear B,

Yesterday, you turned four months old. Apparently this is when I stop counting your life in weeks and switch over to months. I'm glad, because honestly, I was cheating on my phone to see how many weeks you were and unless the person asking was a mom, they just gave me a blank stare. So from now on - months it is.

Attempting to take your 4 month photo. This one is my favorite

The fun part is really starting. You laugh and smile at me every day. Your personality is really starting to come through and I have to thank you for being one of the most easy going and laid back babies that I've ever met. You take our inexperience in stride and pretty much tell us what we need to do. You only cry when you're tired or hungry and both of those situations are easily fixable.

I've been back at work for about a month now, and we've figured out a routine. Honestly, I have a love/hate relationship with being a working mom. I want you to know that your daddy and I didn't take this decision lightly. We crunched the numbers, and realized that, at least for the time being, I have to be a working mom. The good thing about this is that you get to spend your days with Lana and all of your friends. I know that you're enjoying all of the activity that you get to watch and they're all enjoying having you there. Your friend Gavin is very protective of you and you're giving him good practice for when he becomes a big brother this summer.

Working from home with Momma

All of the activity during the day really tires you out at night. You are awake when I pick you up and sometimes take a cat nap in the car on the way home. I selfishly hope that you sleep for a long time, so I can enjoy some additional awake time with you in the evening. Usually though, nap or no nap, around 7-7:30, you start to fuss, telling us that its time for bath, boob and bed. When the fussing starts, I sing you your favorite song, "If you're happy and you know it" and you're powerless to resist. The fussiness changes to smiles as I get you ready for your bath time. Our final chorus of, "If you're happy and you know it, throw a diap at dad" almost always gets you to laugh. After I throw your diaper, we get you into the tub for some relaxation before bed.

As much as you've changed our lives, you've done a great job fitting in. We take you everywhere. We go to the store, to lunches and dinners, to friends and family's house and even into mommy's work. You just hang out in your seat or sit on our laps and enjoy the view. If you are awake, you love to sit up and look around. If you're sleeping, you can sleep through just about anything.

At Wyandotte Winery

I'm having so much fun being your mom and getting to know you. I love that you think that my singing voice is the best ever. I love that you don't mind when Chino sneaks in some kisses. I love that you are so strong. I love how brave you were at the doctor's office when you got your shots. I love how pleasant and happy you've been, even though you've had a cold for a month. Yes. A month. I love how you smile the biggest smiles at me and how you're starting to giggle. I love how you and your daddy have a whole separate way of playing. I love how being a mom makes me feel.

I know that everyone says that time really flies when it comes to your kids, and I agree. But, as someone who was always planning that next big thing, you have forced me to slow down, to enjoy every moment and to live in the now. So, I don't want to keep you young and I don't want you to get older, I want you to be just as you are at this very moment..and the next and the next.

Love,
Momma