No, we're not using Lysol on Chino

Last night, I walk into the house from the gym, expecting my big mutt to come running to greet me.  I take a couple of steps inside and he's laying on the kitchen floor, looking rather traumatized.  I say "hi buddy!!" and get a tail wag, but he doesn't get up.  Finally, I said, "greet me, damn-it" and he grudgingly gets up from the floor and puts on a good show.  I reach down to pet him and notice that he's a tad damp.  This isn't a big deal because he was in desperate need of a bath anyways, so I asked Nick if that's what he did (thinking how motivated he must have been to take on this endeavor by himself on a random Tuesday night - since Chino likes water on his own terms).

Nick proceeds to tell me that Chino rolled IN A DEAD BIRD!!!!  I'm so disgusted that I begin asking random questions, like it matters:

L-"How dead?"

N-"DEAD"

L-"What kind of bird?"

N-"A small one, sparrow or something, why does it matter?  I washed him with Old Spice body wash because I couldn't find his shampoo"

L-"What was he doing?"

N-"I was running and turned around and saw him flip himself over and go to town, so I walked over to him and saw it, hoping that it wasn't what it was..."

L-(smelling Chino) "He still smells"

N-"Get one of those Lysol wipes and clean him off"

L-"I AM NOT LYSOLING THE DOG"

N-"Why not?"

L-"How would you like to be Lysoled?"

N-"Then just wipe him off"

I proceed to get out the baby wipes (NOT LYSOL) and try to wipe the stink off of his face.  Its not working.  I found the dog shampoo and Nick lathered him up, right there on the kitchen floor.  We weren't thinking of rinsing - so I got the bright idea to put him on the counter and hang his head in the sink.  You know, like a beauty parlor.  He is clearly too big for such things, but we  made it work....all the while, I'm laughing my head off and water is getting everywhere.  Poor Chino on the other hand, was very uncomfortable and wondering what in the world he was doing on the counter, as is evident by the expression on his doggie face.  I know he can't talk, but this face just screams, "Ok guys, now what are we doing!?!?"  Once we got him down off of the counter, the counter was Lysoled and he took a running fit.  Just another Tuesday night at our house.  For the full effect - here's a couple of pre-rinse visuals.

Side note:  Chino is notorious for rolling in disgusting things, the whole dead bird incident brings to mind the goose poop incident of '06.  Equally disgusting, and he was equally proud of himself and totally annoyed when we washed off all of his hard work.